How many times have you posed this question to your partner, “What’s on your mind?”, and were given a spectacular, entertaining conversation? Seldom, true?

The reason for this is that no matter how much men want to be upfront, they don’t want to feel vulnerable. Men are very different from women when it comes to sharing their emotions, but this doesn’t in any way imply that they’re devoid of emotions. Men are also human!

In case you’ve been trying to understand him in a better way or are seeking to have the new man in your life open up better, you’ll need to understand how best to push the button that’ll cause him to open up without making him agitated. Below are some tips on how you can do this.

The Facts

Start by opening up to him. The truth behind this observation is based in the realization that men do not open up to or pursue someone that is unwilling to reciprocate this kind of a gesture. If you pretend to be the hard-to-get, cool kind of woman, then he won’t open up his heart to you. However, if you open up first, you’ll be amazed at how easily he’ll do the same to you. Accepting to open up to him, shows him you feel safe, and therefore he’ll also feel safe with you, and therefore helping him to open up to you.

Don’t have any expectations

Being the first to open up is a good step to take. However, telling him “I Love You” without any other expectations than to hear him say the same thing to you will just help him to understand your intentions before you even utter another word. He’ll undoubtedly drop the same “L” bomb back to you without hesitation. Exposing your heart to him without hoping to get anything in return will be an important step to show him that all you want is to understand his feelings.

Avoid judging him

You’ll be shocked by how powerful a simple sentence can be, “I appreciate the way you’re open with me, even when it’s not essentially what I expect to hear.” Love him in totality, including his imperfections, and it will surprise you at how fast he will reciprocate by showering you with the same affections.

If you’d like to truly understand how to read a man’s mind and know what he’s thinking, and be able to influence his thinking to make him more ‘addicted to you’, then you owe it to yourself to watch this presentation:

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Talk less but listen more!

There is a popular saying that goes something like this, “God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason.” Men will talk more when they know someone is listening to them rather than being cut off for someone to throw in their opinion.

Don’t be pushy

Don’t be in a rush to pour out all your relationship anxieties immediately when you see him coming through the door after a tough day at work. Begin by asking him how his day was; listen to him as he answers you. Offer him a glass of wine or ask him to enjoy a shower and let him know you’ll be there to hear all about it after dinner. He’ll be grateful and it’ll result in an open conversation that’ll leave you pleasantly surprised. This will also develop a bond between you, something that won’t happen if you’re pushy.

Don’t cling to the past

Men are perfectly aware that you have a past, they too have a past. They also understand that they haven’t been perfect in any of their past relationships. If you want him to open himself up to you more, reminding him of your heartaches from past relationships, or grabbing every available opportunity to remind him how he failed to show up for a certain event, will only cause him to close up faster than a tortoise that’s sensed danger!

Initiate activities instead of having pre-planned conversations

A single conversation will never and has never changed any relationship. If he realizes that all you want is “a talk” or “the talk”, be assured that he’ll look for other things to preoccupy himself. Consider going for a walk with him, or have a bike ride and just share in his favorite activity. This will help him relax and soon he’ll surprise you as he tells you the things you’ve wanted to hear from him.

The most important fact

In most cases, women don’t understand that for them to get men to talk more, they themselves should talk less. Men do not like pressure and will run away at any hint of it. For this reason, learn how to encourage a conversation with your partner and don’t show him any indications of tension!

This will be a sure way of getting him to open up. If you want him to reveal his true emotions, create a reassuring environment by opening up first. Follow this by being a keen listener when he starts opening up.

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